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So what happens if you continue to be the "mother" to your man? Well, you nag, and try to "mother" and forget how to be a partner. That is what happens. By the time you are married for 30 years (or 10 years, or 10 months), you wonder why your husband is not participating in your marriage. That is what happens.It all starts with your husband doing the dishes, and you don't like the way he does them. You tell him. He gives up because he can't please you. So you make sure that you do them all the time - then you get tired. Your husband dresses the kids when you are at work. You come home, or see them and say - How could you dress them this way? He gives up.... This scenario gets repeated and repeated. Sometimes I really think that we women think that our husbands should know. They do not. We need to express ourselves - heart to heart to our men. We need to talk to our men as their woman and not their mother.
Does this make sense to you?
I think the exact scenario that you are describing above is at the center of the Jon and Kate Plus Eight media coverage. If you ever watched the show (I only recently did to find out what all the commotion was about in the news media) and I was horrified by the way Kate spoke to her husband.....like he was a little boy, not her husband. He's no angel either though...I have no sympathy for either of them due to both playing out the demise of their marriage on national TV, much to the detriment of their children's mental health.
ReplyDeleteIt's all about RESPECT. If you respect your spouse as an equal partner in the relationship, you don't talk to them as if they are a child. You also don't berate them in public to embarrass them. No one enjoys public humiliation. And....why would you want to humiliate someone you supposedly love? THAT doesn't make sense to me.....at ALL!
Very well said my friend!!!!!
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