Hired Hearts ---- hmmmmm

Hello precious sojourners --

I just read this quote:

"In the Harvard Business Review, Seidman writes about the shift to a human economy, focused on "hired hearts" and away from the knowledge economy, which held "sheer intellect" in highest regard. He reports:

In hiring, a recent study of over 1,000 CEOs indicates that above all they seek candidates who are "collaborative, communicative, creative, and flexible." (from Matt Levinson's blog)

I can't help  but see the parallel to marriage -- "hired heart characteristics"

Collaborative - we are in this thing called "marriage," relationship, legacy building  together.  So make it collaborative -- working together -- growing together-- laughing together!

Communicative - What in the world does that really mean???
 I know I communicate - but Paul?  He is lousy at it!
OR is he???? Communicative means being able to communicate (duh:)....
I have to admit, it does not mean doing all the talking. It doesn't mean articulate.  Communicative means being able to listen, suspend judgement... To me, it means working through discussions by honoring each other and giving each other time to express themselves.  Does that make sense?
I wonder how any times I "shut Paul up" because I was doing all the talking and explaining... hmmmm.  Ponder that one .....Perhaps the picture of Uncle Mark and baby Derek are the picture of active communicating?  See how they are listening?  just a thought.....

Creative - Create your relationship!  It will definitely be different than any other relationship ever established.  That doesn't mean you can't learn from others' good relationships.  And I know that I certainly learn from the bad relationships -- don't want to copy that idea!!! :)
So be creative -- enjoy each other -- enjoy creating your legacy!!!  Your adventure! Your story!

Flexible - Urgently needed!!!  It amazes me how much we look at others and think - "Wow, that's a great idea!"  or I want to have a party just like theirs, or I want to have children just like theirs, Or a house like theirs, or or or.....
Please listen here --- One of the biggest pitfalls that I see today (myself included) is the need to have everything perfect!!!!  And with that view comes rigidity --- yucky word in my book!  Rigid!
Now, I certainly want to be rigid about the idea that "divorce' is not in our vocabulary (check this post from long ago on that one.....Never use the "D" word!)
But - the more determined I am to find that perfect piece of clothing, perfect name, perfect menu, perfect body, perfect child--- the more frustrated I become -- And I would venture to say, the more frustrated and depressed my fellow sojourners are too.... (that's you guys by the way - my adult children - and family and friends and readers etc).

Thanks for reading and pondering.  Don't take this all as gospel please.  Just read, and ponder and reflect.... How does this fit into or benefit my relationships?  What take-aways do I want to take away?

And so I ponder --- Am I a "hired heart"  when it comes to my marriage relationship?