I'm not really sure where we heard this nugget of truth. I think it was at a marriage conference we went to when I was pregnant with Scott (it is amazing how you measure time by your children's events :). Anyway, this is excellent advice and Paul and I have lived by this one!
So - what is a plumb line? Well, a plumb is a weight attached to a line to determine whether or not something is on true vertical. If you are "out of plumb" or "off plumb," you are off vertical, or true. In marriage words - if you are out of plumb, if you are sensing that you are not right or true, then you need to make an adjustment to get back on plumb - back on true! And believe me, there are many "things" that push you off plumb; work, other family members, money woes, not enough time. etc etc etc.
Some of our "plumb lines" are: weekly date nights, praying together everyday, phoning each other everyday, going on annual or preferably semi-annual retreats away-just for the two of us, going to church together, never going to bed angry, and going over our budget weekly. (There are some intimate plumb lines too!) Those are a few of the ones that stand out for me right now. We have decided as a couple that these are some of the "things" that will keep us true. keep our marriage strong, straight, vertical.
Do we pray absolutely every day? Do we go out every single week alone? Absolutely not! Stuff happens! We get busy and preoccupied with other things. We get lazy. Or, we get plain old tired. However, because we have established our own "plumb lines" we recognize when we get off plumb more readily. That is the value!
Wikipedia has another definition for a plumb line: A plumb line is a line regarded as directed exactly toward the Earth's center of gravity. So establish your marriage's plumb line! And be sure that you are always pointing that plumb to the Way, the Truth and the Life! (John 14:6) He is your Center and holds you together!
plumb. (2009). In Merriam-Webster Online Dictionary.
Retrieved June 26, 2009, from http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/plumb
Picture retrieved June 26, 2009 from www.elizabethharperneeld.com
love this!
ReplyDeleteKathy....I do believe you could become the "Dear Abby" of marriage counseling......I mean it! Such great and sage advice! Hugs,Donna
ReplyDeleteI really love this posting, Kathy! The advice given really encourages couples to be proactive rather than reactive about their marriage. If more couples made this commitment to "check in" on the state of their marriage on a regular basis, I believe it would definitely have an effect on the divorce rate.....by lowering it. Dave and I will certainly follow your sage advice and implement your plumb line strategy to make sure our marriage stays on track.
ReplyDeleteThe plumb line idea if vital and I agree with you wholeheartedly Donna! It keeps us always working together towards agreement...
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